exhausted

im exhausted of everything. and i do mean everything. im exhausted with school, assignments, boring routine. Wait? whats my routine? oh yes, going to school, getting tired. not paying attention, losing focus, just wanting to go home and sleep. then wake up, miss dinner and do my homework. waiting for scott to get online, talk to him for only awhile. he doesn't knw how annoying it is to wait for him, only talking to him for a short time. when i asked him not to leave, he says he have to, whatever. im tired of that. then going back to do assignments and crying soon after cos i can't do chemistry, thats for sure. then doing math is stressing me out. looking at geog tutorials is irritating me. im just exhausted but i cant break this. my life is so dull right now. and i can't help it. i dont know wht i enjoy doing so tht i can break from my monotone routine. this cycle repeats every other school day. by the time weekends, im burn out.

and honestly im tired of waiting for scott to come online and tired of cristian to finally appear. i cant blame thats the sucky part, he wants to focus and study. i guess he cant spare a small moment for me. just to help clear things up with us. i dont think scott sees my problem, duhh he doesnt cos he doesnt know im secretly wanting to be back with cristian. what a bitch i am. fuck.
i want cristian back cos we havent officially break up, we're.. i dont know. i dont knw what we are right now. are we together? are we single now? i am tired of waiting. it was since november last year. now its march. 5 months, you're killing. its so hard for me. im telling a computer my feelings. a robot tht doenst have feelings at all. nice work.

im thankful that scott is so happy go lucky but i dont know. he does listens to me. he's the most perfect guy a girl could ever want. so fucking sweet. im just tired of everything. i need some sleep but then im gonna miss scott. see! oh god, can this thing get any more annoying? grrr
i hate him =.= i said tht to evry one sheesh